The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Ron DeSantis Launches U.S. Presidential Bid In Glitch-Filled Twitter Broadcast [717d]
• Man At Beach Worried Wife Hasn’t Surfaced For Air Because She Cheating On Him [717d]
• Fans Speculate Who Taylor Swift Might Be Talking About In New Song ‘My Weird Little Racist Guy’ [717d]
• Aveeno Unveils Moisture-Locking Facial Breading Treatment [717d]
• 104-Year-Old Man Awarded WWII Medal Just To Be Nice [717d]
• This Map Shows Whether Each State Calls Abortions ‘Soda’ Or ‘Pop’ [717d]
• Scientists Ambivalent About Breakthrough After Bringing Hitler Back To Life [718d]
• Drone Operator Takes Out Few Civilians To Seem Busy As Supervisor Walks By [718d]
• Jeff Bezos, Lauren Sánchez Engaged [718d]
• 4-Hour Standing Ovation Leaves Cannes Audience With Mangled Nubs [718d]
• Jimmy Carter Completes 4-Minute Mile [718d]
• Mom Grates Lemon Zest Onto Plate As Dessert [718d]
• Matt Gaetz Takes Out Half-Page Ad In House Bill Congratulating Teen Girl On High School Graduation [718d]