The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau Announces Separation From Wife Sophie [1005d]
• Water Shortage Forcing More Golf Courses To Use Insulin [1005d]
• DeSantis Bans AP Psychology Out Of Fear People Will Figure Out What’s Wrong With Him [1005d]
• Sen. Feinstein Cedes Power of Attorney To Broom Resembling Daughter [1005d]
• FBI Arrests Millions Of Americans Who Didn’t See ‘Sound Of Freedom’ Under Suspicion Of Child Trafficking [1005d]
• This Week's Most Viral News: August 4, 2023 [1005d]
• ‘I See…Unfortunately, You Must Now Be Punished,’ Says Doctor Learning Patient Doesn’t Have Health Insurance [1005d]
• Republicans Explain Why Trump Is Innocent [1005d]
• Americans Explain Whether Joe Biden Should Pardon His Son [1005d]
• Biden Proves Fitness By Having Limp Body Dragged Around White House Lawn [1005d]
• Cops Confirm Mass Shooter’s Motivation Sounds Pretty Compelling [1005d]
• Kid Self-Conscious He Only One At Pool Who Still Needs To Use Diving Bell [1005d]
• Drunk Man Attempts To Talk Some Sense Into Mechanical Bull [1005d]