The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• COP28 Attendees Take Turns Posing With Duck From Dawn Commercial [874d]
• Clarence Thomas Swallows Whole Bottle Of OxyContin During Recess In Attempt To Get In On Purdue Settlement [874d]
• Mom Asks If You Still Friends With That One Guy Who Committed Suicide [874d]
• Conservatives Explain Why Football Is Too Woke [874d]
• Supreme Court Rules Anyone Who Had Abortion Under Roe Must Be Re-Impregnated [874d]
• Third-Party Candidate Promises To Fill Whatever Void Still Left Between Centrist Democrats, Centrist Republicans [874d]
• Study: Average American Has At Least 3 People Plotting To Kill Them At All Times [874d]
• Scientists Successfully Teach Mice To Hate Women [874d]
• Endless Shrimp Deal Causes Major Profit Loss For Red Lobster [874d]
• Alpha Male Constipated [874d]