The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Old Man Whistling While Slapping Knee Once Again Sweeps Grammys [803d]
• Travis Kelce Quietly Avoiding Fact He Has No Idea What Japan Is [803d]
• New Immigration Bill Would Only Let In Migrants Accompanied By Group Of Hot Girls [803d]
• Florida Names Penis As Official State Genital [803d]
• Signs You Are A Beta Male [803d]
• Stanley Cups Revealed To Contain Lead [803d]
• Biden Gives Americans Nuclear Launch Codes In Case Anything Ever Happens To Him [803d]
• 38-Year-Old Assumed He’d Have Settled Down On Distant Monster-Filled Planet By Now [803d]
• Daycare Boasts Great Screen-To-Toddler Ratio [803d]
• Widow Cucked [803d]
• Ohio Begins Executing Random People In Hopes They’re Criminals [803d]