The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Bankrupt Red Lobster Runs All-You-Can-Grab Copper Wiring Promotion [183d]
• Iranian President Stoned To Death With Mountain [183d]
• Man Takes Much-Needed Paternity Leave To Focus On Himself [183d]
• Frustrated Cicadas Assumed There’d Be More Than One Hole For Trillion Insects To Emerge From [183d]
• This Is What Happens To Smokers’ Lungs [183d]
• West Virginia Candidate Bitten By Snakes While Removing Election Signs [183d]
• Endless Hallway [183d]
• Comic Convention Stairs Go Unused [183d]
• College Sophomore Emails 32-Year-Old To Ask Him About Experience Being Total Loser Who Has Accomplished Nothing With Life [183d]
• Fertility Researchers Explain Scientific Advances Could One Day Allow Parents To Choose Name Of Child [183d]