The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• CDC: ‘Definitely Too Hot Out To Wear A Condom’ [1144d]
• Nancy Pelosi Arrives In Taiwan Despite China’s Warnings [1144d]
• Men Reveal Why They’ve Decided To Get Vasectomies [1145d]
• ‘And I Want Your Tie Too,’ Says Sinema, Giving Biden Conditions Of Her Support For Bill [1145d]
• Friends Make Pact To Get Married If They’re Both Still Ugly When They’re 40 [1145d]
• Passenger Fined $1,874 After 2 Undeclared McMuffins Found In Luggage [1145d]
• Desperate Biden Announces Halloween Will Now Happen Every Month [1145d]
• Uber App Now Allowing Passengers To Rate Driver’s Ethnicity [1145d]
• Frustrated Fire Truck Driver Takes Another Spin Around Block After Only Open Spot In Front Of Fire Hydrant [1145d]
• ATV Driver Goes Off-Cliffing [1145d]