The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• 10-Year-Olds Found Working At McDonald’s Until 2 A.M. [1100d]
• Amy Coney Barrett Pissed She’s Been Doing Whatever Conservative Donors Want For 30 Bucks [1100d]
• Clarence Thomas Promises To Adopt Code Of Ethics For The Right Price [1100d]
• Orlando Launches Bid For MLB Team In Attempt To Make City More Unappealing [1100d]
• Mysterious Deaths At Churchill Downs Investigated By World-Renowned Horse Detective Ahead Of Kentucky Derby [1100d]
• McDonald’s Under Fire For Employing 7-Year-Old Grimace [1100d]
• This Week's Most Viral News: May 5, 2023 [1100d]
• Anthropological Research Reveals Ancient Cultures Used Psychedelics To Increase Productivity Within Startup Companies [1100d]
• Man Fondly Recalls Days He’d Play Outside Unsupervised, Get Molested, Come Home For Dinner [1100d]
• The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Meghan And Harry [1100d]
• Mom Heartbroken That Daughter Looks So Fat In Casket [1100d]
• Shadows Elongate Across Bedroom Wall As Another Day Turns To Night [1100d]