The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• NFL Introduces Touching Flyover Tribute For All Veterans Of Domestic Violence [962d]
• Lauren Boebert Kicked Out Of ‘Beetlejuice’ Musical For Vaping, Causing Disturbance [962d]
• Aaron Rodgers Hits $5 Million Contract Incentive After Finishing Season With Zero Interceptions [962d]
• ‘They Made Her Way Less Hot,’ Complains Conservative Pundit Looking At Picture Of His Mom [962d]
• Jimmy Carter Makes Pact With Dianne Feinstein That If Both Single In 50 Years They’ll Marry Each Other [962d]
• Danelo Cavalcante Returns To Empty Pennsylvania Prison After Everyone Else Escapes [962d]
• Man Requests Spotter For Particularly Messy Sandwich [962d]
• Suburbanites Baffled By Person Outdoors Who Isn’t Delivering Something [962d]
• Report: Some Group Called ‘Dads For America’ Currently Running Over Your Kid’s Teacher With A Car [962d]
• Elon Musk Claims Women He Impregnated Were All Terminal [962d]
• Catholics Flock To Church To See ‘Intact’ Remains Of Nun Who Died In 2019 [962d]
• Pros And Cons Of Impeaching Joe Biden [962d]
• Americans React To Nancy Pelosi Running For Reelection [962d]
• Disgusted Teen Stumbles Upon Parents’ Crazy Sex Toy [962d]