The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Panicked Tim Walz Trapped In Football Metaphor For Third Consecutive Day [584d]
• Aides Beg J.D. Vance To Stop Carrying Model Of Woman’s Pelvis While Meeting Voters [584d]
• RFK Jr. Calls Democratic Party Unrecognizable For Failure To Automatically Grant Position To Kennedy [584d]
• Child Standing With Both Arms Down Pants [584d]
• Prettiest Girl At Bachelorette Party Demands Everyone Look Pretty [584d]