The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• MrBeast Sued By Contestants For Unsafe Conditions [69d]
• Ways Secret Service Can Improve Trump’s Security [69d]
• ‘They’re Getting Shot,’ Kamala Harris Warns Home Intruders, Burglars, Litterbugs, Slow Walkers [69d]
• Ohtani Cashes In 50-Home-Run Futures Bet Ticket [69d]
• North Carolina Voters Abandon Mark Robinson For Nude Africa User ‘FootPapa12’ [69d]
• American Black Nazi Party Worried Mark Robinson Could Hurt Other Candidates Down Ballot [69d]
• Lt. Gov. Mark Robinson: ‘We All Have Crazy Ideas About Slavery When We’re Horny’ [69d]
• Scarecrow Has Double Ds [70d]
• Hellspawn Annoyed By Sound Of Earth’s Residents Stomping Around Overhead [70d]
• Mother Earth Insists She Doesn’t Want Any Pagan Sacrifices This Equinox [70d]
• Diddy Arrested On Sex Trafficking Charges [70d]