The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Orangutan Stuns Researchers By Using Rogaine To Fix Bald Spot [707d]
• Arrests At Pro-Palestinian College Protests Reach 2,000 Nationally [707d]
• Advisors Assure Biden This Will Blow Over Once All Gazans Dead [707d]
• Nation Disappointed After Biden Answers Business Call During Big Recital [707d]
• Annoying Teen On Train Has Girlfriend’s Whole Face In Mouth [707d]
• Japanese Town To Build Screen Blocking Tourists’ View Of Mount Fuji [707d]
• Taylor Swift Begins Day By Playing Video Reminding Travis Kelce Who She Is, How Long They’ve Dated [707d]