The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Nearly Half Of All Borrowers Have Not Restarted Student Loan Payments [134d]
• Boston Celtics Up For Sale [135d]
• Traditional 10,000-Calorie Sumo-Style Dinner Leaves American Tourist Writhing In Hunger [135d]
• Report: It Not Fair Other People Get To Enjoy Their Lives [135d]
• New Trump Ad Shows Montage Of People He’ll Kill If Elected [135d]
• Caitlin Clark Brushes Off 23 Stab Wounds From Own Teammates [135d]
• Biden Spends Press Conference Gnawing On Extension Cord [135d]