The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Trump ‘Not Joking’ About Seeking Third Term [124d]
• Attorney General Seeks Death Penalty For All UnitedHealthcare Customers [124d]
• College Campus Tour Ends Inside Unmarked ICE Vehicle [124d]
• COBRA Extension Lets Terminated Employees Continue Raiding Office Fridge For 18 Months [125d]
• Guy Ordering Nonalcoholic Beer Has Either Seen A Ton Of Shit Or No Shit At All [125d]
• Highway Patrol Officer Asks Pete Hegseth To Carry Out Drone Strikes In Straight Line [125d]
• Only Bag Of Chips Big Enough For Funeral Reception Says ‘Party Size!’ On It [125d]