The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Texas Doctor Tapes Pregnancy Pamphlet To Comatose Woman’s Forehead [268d]
• Allergic Swelling Leaves Kristi Noem’s Face Completely Recognizable [268d]
• Tourist Damages Museum’s Crystal-Covered Chair By Sitting On It [268d]
• Physicists Discover Never-Before-Seen Particle In Back Of Old Cupboard [268d]
• Passengers At Gate Saddened By Poor Frightened Plane Loose Inside Airport [268d]
• Malin Rourke [268d]
• Yours, In Exchange For One Night With Your Wife [268d]